In Love & Balance
October 17, 2024
Credit: Pinterest
Writer: Fallon Kogan
Editor: Dani Eder
Over the past few years, my love for cooking has grown immensely. This love ultimately began with the simple goal of learning how to cook basic meals. After many fun yet frustrating failed attempts following TikTok recipes, I finally created a dish that my family loved. The glow on their faces as they enjoyed my now-famous chicken piccata inspired me to delve deeper into this new hobby. I recall scouring the internet, seeking out new recipes and spending hours in the kitchen perfecting dishes. I poured my heart and soul into cooking meals that I hoped would bring my friends and family joy.
As I immersed myself into this newfound passion, preparing meals became my way of showing love and care. However, amidst the whirlwind of attempting to cater to everyone’s tastes and preferences, I often forgot to make something for myself, leading me to snack on leftovers or nothing at all. I was caught in a cycle of continuously prioritizing others, and not just in the kitchen. Each day, I found myself constantly doing things for those around me, often stretching my energy thin until there was nothing left.
During my senior year of high school, my best friend was going through a difficult time. As her friend, I didn't hesitate to be there for her. At the same time, I was in the thick of the college process and had just been deferred from my dream school. I was struggling, but I chose to put all those feelings aside to be present for her.
This is merely one instance in which I placed the needs of others before my own.
Over time, this cycle began to take its toll. I had stretched my energy so thin that I didn’t have the capacity to handle my own obligations, emotions, and passions. The exhaustion seeped deep, leaving me drained and unable to offer anything more. It was a stark but necessary wake-up call that highlighted the imbalance in my life.
This pattern led me to realize the importance of taking care of myself. I began to understand that in order to continue pouring love and care into others, I need to start by caring for me.
Although this journey began with a simple dinner for my family, it expanded far beyond that. Prioritizing myself has not been about diminishing my acts of service for others; rather, it has enhanced them. I have learned that I can recharge my energy by setting aside time for self-care—whether it's long naps, playing with my dogs, or flipping through cookbooks. These simple yet fulfilling acts of self-care not only rejuvenate me, but also enhance my presence around others.
In our daily lives, it is easy to get lost in the lives of others, and it's important to set aside some time for yourself. By establishing a practice of self-care and nurturing our own well-being, we are able to engage more authentically with the world around us.
It is not selfish to refill your own cup so that you can pour into others.
It makes me happy to know I am a reliable person for my friends to lean on in times of need. It makes me even happier to know I can be a better version of myself for them. When I’m rested, content, and fulfilled, I can offer more genuine support, patience, and love to my friends and family. Nurturing myself has transformed the way I express my love language, enriching both my life and the lives of those around me.
